I am increasingly finding it difficult to separate myself from the plight of Israel and the decisions and choices of her leaders this summer. I ride to work with NPR blaring away, telling me how sad and tragic the situation is for the Lebanese and you know what? I couldn't give a damn. I really couldn't. Because all I can think about are the people on the busses that blew sky high when a terrorist dressed as a religious Jew boarded the bus and detonated himself. Or the folks sitting at their seder table who suddenly were blown to bits when a woman in a thick coat walked into the hotel where they were celebrating.
I think of all of them and of the thousands more who lived, terrorized, all these years and no one outside of Israel did a thing.
And as I listen to this drivel about how cruel and inhuman the Israelis are and how since 300 and some civilians have been killed on one side, that makes the 200 and some killed on the other side irrelevent because they belonged to the AGGRESSOR...I can't help but be mad.
In my head I think that bombing a people really not directly involved isn't a necessarily a right or just thing...but in my heart, I know that they're just as responsible as the closest Hezbollah member is...because they allow them to live among them, to seek shelter, to use them as a shield.
If everyone can run away and say, "It isn't my fault because I didn't launch the rocket even though I allowed the rocket launcher to sleep in my house," then no one is responsible and everyone is responsible.
Me? I find it hard to separate my identity as a Jew from my feelings about Israel and her right to a peaceful existence. I feel like because I AM a Jew, I am in for a penny and in for a pound regardless of the outcome.
I don't want to watch the news...not that I don't want to know what's going on, but because I cannot stand the slanted, pro-Palestinian western media. "Look at the big, bad Jews and what they do to the poor little, hut-living Palestinians!" They don't talk about all the concessions that were made for them or how freely they come and go in Israeli society for the most part - no, it is best to show the downtrodden underdog being bullied around by the Jew in the tank who has no heart...no soul.
Well, MY Jewish soul cannot stand that. It rips me apart. So...right or wrong, I am tied to my homeland and to the hope that THIS time...it will finally work.